I Took Him Up To Take Him Down
by James Malarkey & Harry Lauder
submitted by James Hutton

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One day I got tipsy and to bounce I did commence.
When a chap is fill'd with whiskey he has very little sense.
A p'liceman he came up to me and he said he'd run me in;
I said, "You! you must be crazy, when you like you can begin!"

1st. Chorus
So he took me up to take me down;
I wrestled with him all about the town.
I yelled aloud for his key, but but I didn't get a sup.
Just to take me down a peg or two, he took me up.

Verse 2

A friend of mine the other day was throwing out his weight,
And he said there wasn't one of us he wasn't fit to "bate."
He told us of the fights he'd done, and the men that he did box,
And he said that ev'ry blow of his was fit to kill an ox.

2nd. Chorus - repeat
So I took him up to take him down;
I gave him one, and knock'd him on the ground.
I quickly show'd him he was nothing but a pup;
Just to take him down a peg or two, I took him up.

Verse 3

A widow I once I courted,  and a buxom dame was she;
But of course, she neve told me that she had a family.
Well, one night I made love to her; I was fairly gone astray.
When I axed her if she'd marry me, bedad, she named the day!

3rd. Chorus - repeat
And she took me up to take me down;
Her family quickly had me for a clown.
I quickly found that I had sorrow for to sup.
Just to take me down a peg or two, she took me up.

Verse 4
I went and told McCloskie of the scolding wife I had;
He said, "Man I'd quickly cure her, was she fifty times as bad!"
Said he, "I'd spulverize her! I would make her hold her tongue.
Aye," said he, I'd hypnotise her, even if I should get hung!"

4th. Chorus - repeat
So I took him up to take to take him down;
At the door the "Mis-sis" met him with a frown.
She nearly tore his eyes out and she smash'd him with a cup;
Just to take him down a peg or two, she took him up.

Note: sheetmusic is very old and yellowed.

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