THE SOUTH POLE; or, THE BOUNDING BOUNDER
by Randolph King & Harry Lauder
contributed by Bruce McCausland

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They call me quiet Sandy, 'cause I like to be alone.
I love the bounding, bouncing wave, the ocean is my home.
I could tell you lots o' tales you never heard afore,
So when I tell you what I'm gaun to tell, ye'll simply roar.

Chorus
Out on the bounding ocean, over the bounding sea,
Bounding over the bounding wave, that's the place for me.
I'm a bounding bounder when I'm bounding over the sea,
Up the north o' the Firth o' Forth I bound on the bounding sea.

Verse 2

The tales I often tell my friends they cause them great suprise,
But what's the good of telling tales when they say you're telling lies?
Now, I'm a chap that wouldn't lie, the truth is eas'ly said,
The only time I ever lie is when I lie in bed,

Spoken:
And what I'm going to tell you is the truth, and if you haven't heard about it,  well,
it's time you did hear about it.  But you must have heard about- No?- well,   I'll tell you how
Shackleton and I nearly discovered the South Pole.  It was one Sunday morning - No-  I'm
telling a lie - it was a Saturday morning, 'cause I had borrowed a couple of bob, and had
rushed into this little refreshment place, when Shackleton introduced himself and asked me
what I would have.  Well, I needn't tell you he was just in time to save my two bob, I said,
"What are you having yourself, Shack?" He said, "Oh, I'm having a small liqueur."  I said,
"Well, I'll have a large one." So I scoffed it off quick. So Shack gave the waiter a wink to
fetch another.  (hic) So I scoffed it off too. So Shack said to me,  "You seem to be very dry,
Sandy."  I said, "Yes, sir, I'm always dry in the morning." He said, "What's the cause of
that?"  I said, "It's because I don't drink enough at nicht."  However, Shack said,  "Sandy,
you're the swiftest drinker I ever seen" I said, "Shack, I run no risks. i once got my glass
knocked over." So Shack said, "I see you're sea-faring man." I said, "Yes,I'm a jelly-fish
catcher." He said, "How would you like to go to the South Pole?" I said, "All right, Shack." 
So Shack said, "Be at the ship to-morrow at 10:30." So I was there at 10:30. So Shack said,
"Well, what would you like to do during the voyage?" I said, "Steer the wheel." So when we
got out into the open, I said, " What road are you going to take, Shack!" He said, "Bear to
the left, take the first turning to the right." So after being at the wheel for six weeks, one
morning I heard a voice shouting  "Reverse!"  So I reversed, and the twist I gave the wheel
done it no good. She turned around three times, then skidded. Then Shack came running up
on deck, and said, "You blethering fool! did you not see the iceberg?" I said, "No! I thought
it was a London fog."  However, we prepared to search for the pole. So after we provisioned,
Shack had two bottles o' stout, and I had three bottles o' Dewar's and a biscuit, we went in
search of the pole. So we couldn't find it nowhere; so we started hunting. I killed three bears,
two walrus, shack killed one seal and three wee whales , and then we made tracks for the ship.
So on the road, Shack said, "I smell something."  I said, "It's a taxi."  He said, "No, I don't
think it is; anyway," he said, "I see a light."  I said, "That's right, Shack; it's tje tail lamp, you
see." But we didn't meet up on it. so when we got on board , Shack said, "What do you think we
should do, sandy?"  I said, Let us go home and say we have found the Pole, and if they don't
believe us, well, we can refuse to discuss the matter- unless the Zoological Society compels us;
and if we are ordered to go before the board, we can go singing...
 
 

Chorus
Out on the bounding ocean, over the bounding sea,
Bounding over the bounding wave, that's the place for me.
I'm a bounding bounder when I'm bounding over the sea,
Up the north o' the Firth o' Forth I bound on the bounding sea.

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